There are so many stressful and arduous elements of being an early adult trying to get an education and simultaneously fulfill one’s hopes, dreams, and weekend plans, but nothing is so laborious and annoying as doing laundry. You stumble home on a Sunday night, exhausted from a busy weekend and looking ahead to an even more exhausting week, and you realize that you’ve only got your high school cross country shorts and a bowtie to wear. Instead of slowly crumbling to the ground and weeping to yourself until you finally force yourself to do your laundry, here are some helpful tips to avoid it altogether.

This one seems sort of intuitive; instead of washing your clothes, just don’t. Re-wear all of them. Not much has changed about them since you last wore them except for now they smell like your uncle after he passed out by the pool with a half-eaten pizza on his stomach. But that shouldn’t be an issue either, because if someone brings up the smell, you just blame it on someone else. It’s a win-win...no one thinks you smell and you’re the hero for calling out the smelly person. 

2. Move in with your parents (or someone else’s)
There is a pretty good chance that your parents did your laundry in high school. So why not in college too? Shoot your mom or dad a text right now describing how much you miss them and how the people at your school are mean and you want to come home. Your laundry will be taken care of from that point on. And if that doesn’t work because your home is too far away from campus, move in with someone else’s parents! Show up at a door to a nice looking house, give the residents a hug, tell them how much you missed them and move in. They will likely feel too awkward and sad for the confused kid who thinks he is their child to turn you away. 

3. Go nude
I’ll admit this one might be a little uncomfortable at first, but like Arcade Fire or hummus, it’s an acquired taste. At first, you’ll be off-put by all the screams and giggles and forcible arrests. But over time you’ll come to appreciate things in ways you never had before, like the summer breeze, soft chair cushions, room temperature and open-minded people. People will say that you’re crazy, but if you’re not doing laundry and they are...who’s the REAL crazy one here? 

4. Have someone wrong you, and make your laundry their punishment
It’s tough to just flat out ask someone to do huge favors for you. You can’t just go up to a person and say, “Do my laundry for a year,” or “Be my child’s surrogate father.” It just doesn’t work. However, if that person owes you something, it’s completely appropriate to make them do those things. For example, introduce your friend to your mother as she’s wearing a funny hat, so that later, when he comments on your mother’s silly hat, you can call him out for insulting your mother, and voila, you now have a laundry servant. 

5. Do your laundry.
The last, but certainly not least important tip to getting out of doing your laundry is to do your laundry. You just put it into the washing machine, pour some detergent, start it up, move it to the dryer, push a button, take it out, unfold it and put it away, and BAM, you don’t have to do laundry anymore! It’s a task so easy that civilization has been doing it even throughout the times that doctors used leeches to suck out diseases. Doing your laundry is the simplest and easiest trick to get you out of doing your laundry.