Heartbreaker.
Heartbroken.
Heads shake in antipathy for those who enact the suffering.
Gentle hands fall upon those who are afflicted by the suffering.
The world can be so unfair.
Not once do humans pity the heartbreaker. Why would they? The heartbreaker merely reaches their hands into the bodies of others and rips the still beating heart from the very temple the heart used to once reside in. They take the once earned trust, passion, hope and joy, and crumble the gifts all into a fine powder, then hastily blow these remnants back into the heartbroken face. Finally, worst of all, the heartbreaker leaves the heartbroken in the dust of their own remains, never to return again. Images of first dates, late night calls, romantic love making and the like fly out the window and smack the heartbroken in the face as they relive each moment whilst the photos swirl about them.
Poor heartbroken soul.
But ignorance is bliss.
Not once do we look at the heartbreaker and feel some kind of sadness for them, some kind of empathy or hidden desire to console them. The heartbreaker just destroyed someone’s life. Right?
Wrong.
Those who have sensitive souls and compassion in their hearts cannot emphasize enough how painful it is to take something so beautiful and rare, and simply have to give it back. Take a step back and then another one. Who is No. 1 in your life? Your mom? Your sister? No, the answer is rather clear. The No. 1 person in your life is you. Five years from now, it will not be your sister accepting the job offer across the country. And in 10 years, it will not be your mother marrying the man waiting for you at the end of the aisle. When it comes to breaking someone’s heart, any person with feelings and emotions can understand how it feels to have to let someone go, someone who was such a big part of their life, simply because they were not the right match. How do you tell someone that it is “not you, it is me”? When in reality, it is your fault and they are perfect the way they are, just not perfect for you. They may have the whole package: a great job, a healthy body, impressive communication skills and so forth, but there is a feeling in the pit of your stomach or a voice in the back of your head that just says "no, this is not right." There is a continuous gust of wind that keeps blowing out the flame in your heart. Why is that wind there? Why do clouds heavily overcast your mind, triggering flurries of reluctance to be with your significant other and neglect for their feelings, the need for separation and ultimately distance? Why can’t your mind just be at ease? Why can’t you just ignore the clouds that scatter through your mind, releasing a downpour of emotional detachment and ultimately lack of affection towards your once-lover?
Because out in the world there is a person holding the matches that will keep that flame continuously burning inside your heart. They will calm the bellowing winds and disperse the clouds. Your mind will reduce itself to a gentle breeze and light will descend. Those voices will subside into a quiet nothingness and that feeling in the pit of your stomach will be replaced by flutters of butterflies tickling you, awakening you and making you feel more alive than you could ever feel.
The heartbroken blame themselves when, in reality, there is someone out there holding the matches, or lighter or candlestick, for them as well. All they feel is abandonment and developing feelings of mistrust. They pity themselves, lash out, beg for the heartbreaker to come back and ease the pain and then sink into an empty abyss filled with only darkness. An abyss where emotions are forbidden and the desire to do anything, feel anything, or go on is hindered from existence. Their body becomes a hallow tomb holding the dusty remains of their former self with no resemblances to its former elegant temple.
Is it fair to say the heartbreaker should have stayed? Is it better to pretend and fake a smile everyday or be honest, ultimately causing a downward spiral of pain?
Heartbreakers, in a way, are a saving grace. Once the heartbroken begin their steep climb out of the abyss, they realize how truly opulent the world really is. Now, that climb is not easy. They will sometimes slip on untrustworthy tear-stained ledges, tumble further down the wall with little strength. The heartbroken will have to let things go, tossing bitterness and resentment into the abyss, to grow lighter and make the climb less strenuous. They will have to gain strength, sometimes work harder than before, pulling themselves over steep outcrops and rough ridges. And then finally the heartbroken will become whole again as they face the sun and let the rays warm their skin. The tomb returns to a temple where the heart will beat stronger than ever. What a journey. And deep down there is only one person to thank for that learning experience, that new strength and clarity, that realization that the heartbreaker was not abandoning them, casting them off as if they were nothing, but freeing them to a world full of possibilities.
Heartbreakers have to find the strength deep down inside them to free what they once felt so bound too, so connected and enveloped with. And that feat is not easy. It is an enormous sacrifice. What if the world cannot offer that flame? That spark of love again? What if the heartbroken is really the one, maybe not at this time, but further down their path in life? Then what? Will the once heartbroken trust again and be able to love the heartbreaker like before? So many questions dwindle on the sacrifice to let someone so special go and reunite with the free world. And that right there is real heartbreak.