Life Through A Lens..
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Life Through A Lens..

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Life Through A Lens..

My analogy is that each day is just one page a part of one story in one book, called your life. But you’re not allowed to rip any pages out, no matter how bad you want to. Because reality reminds us that there are certain parts of our lives that we wish we could change, or erase them like they never happened, but we can’t. It is when we are able to fully grasp what one has seen with his or her eyes, through our own eyes…that makes life worth it.

That’s why clicking with someone new tends to be fun and refreshing. You’re given another chance to tell your story. But you’re telling your story as someone is becoming a part of it. And along the way, you may experience some really great stuff to add to it. Or bad stuff. At the end of the day, it’s still your story. And every day, no matter what you experience, is still a page added to your story.

You are seen as who you are right now, in the present, but your past is a mystery. And somehow it’s up to you to fill in the blanks to portray your life in an accurate light. Because we want to be loved for who we are, not who someone thinks we are. Feeling nostalgic, you travel through your past, and try to take this person you’ve just met along with you for the ride.   

Your whole world rewinds to slow motion as a holographic flood of home videos and photographs and the voices of your parents as you are handed your diploma at graduation and you blowing out candles on your birthday unleash into the wild as you try to refresh your memory of moments in your life.    

But slow-mo speeds up like summer and you find yourself back in the moment, trying to share your lens on life with this person.    

In a previous article, I tried to describe clips of reality in which I thought I was experiencing happiness. Proud of my work, I forwarded my article to Michael Brodrick, my philosophy professor at the time.   His feedback was that he enjoyed my writing, but that he suspected that I am misinterpreting my feelings of joy with happiness. He explained, “It is the sheer joy of being alive that comes when the energy of life surges through us, heightening all the senses at once. Happiness is something “cooler” than that. It is more like the contentment that flows from living the right way, even if we are not always getting what we want or feeling joyful."

“That couldn’t be,” I thought to myself. “I know what I’m feeling.” 

But it turns out you were right, professor Brodrick. It wasn’t until this summer that I think I have finally, truly— discovered the meaning of happiness. And I’m not fully there yet, but it feels good to be lost in the right direction.   

My entire life I have been notorious of resisting change. A change of schedule, a change of pace, a change of heart—anything to interrupt what I was accustomed to did not settle well with me. Knowing this, I attempted to seek opportunities where I would be out of my comfort zone.    

So, in April, when figuring out my summer plans, I tried to avoid the option of just coming home to Cleveland.  

I then spent the next couple months applying to camp counselor positions in Arizona, Colorado, and Maine. Three states that I’ve traveled and explored and fallen completely in love with. But I was pretty late in the game of the application process, and felt hopeless.  

I grew weary of the idea of bumming around, with the occasional babysitting job here and there, or working a useless minimum wage paying job that I didn’t enjoy.  

It wasn’t until my little in Phi Mu, Sammy, told me she could probably get me a summer position at the camp she works at in Maine.    

This was it. This was my big adventure. I had nothing else to do, no one else to worry about… I need to go, I kept thinking.   

After being offered the summer camp position via Skype, days before returning home, I had decided not to take the job. Typical me, backing out of commitment. Not following through with something that is probably good for me. The change of pace scared me, I’ll admit it.   

Shortly after coming home in May, our dog-walker, Carol, mentioned to me that she could use some help with her business. She asked if I could temporarily take over some of her clients, and help her out weekly.    

So that’s it then, friends. The summer I became a professional dog walker...but really. And surprisingly it was the best job I have ever taken.    

I listen to Carol on our walks, as she reminisces on her travels to Paris, Germany, or Rome. She loves to travel and has so much experience, so much wisdom, and so worth listening to. She reminds me not to get caught up in “the little stuff” and pay more attention to “the big stuff.” We go to breakfast together on Saturday mornings and sit outside and talk about our lives. She’s selfless—really—and pays me to run her German Shepard every morning. I guess you could say I lucked out.    

Whoever would have thought this job could offer me such a great mentor, let alone, boss. I’m so grateful for these past couple months I have gotten to know Carol.    

Along with this experience, this summer I ran into a kid I went to kindergarten with and spent some time getting to know him a little more. It had been about thirteen years since I had even seen him and now, he’s my boyfriend. A few days ago, we were driving home from a night in the city, and I looked over at him. It was one of those moments I seem to always mention in my articles. Moments of clarity, I like to call them. We were listening to Pink Floyd’s, “Dark Side of the Moon.” An album he loves and now shares with me. He looked so content with his thoughts, and for a split second I felt apart of his whole world just by looking at him. The thirteen years between us had escaped, and it seemed as if they had never even existed. He looked back at me, and smiled. Like he knew it, too.

“What,” he asked, as I laughed.   

“I’m going to write about this moment,” I told him.    

And I don’t know where it will take me, but I do know that I’m here right now. I think about how much time we spend worrying about making the right decision. When in reality, the decision we make is going to be the right one, no matter what. Solely because we made it.

But how could it be that the biggest adventure was waiting for me right at home, all along? I’m not going to end this article saying, “I’m a lucky girl!” or, “I’m so blessed.”   In reality, I trusted myself. Instead of changing who I am to seek an adventure, I embraced it—and it brought me the biggest adventure of all.    

So I am just out here, doing my thing, adding chapters to my life. Good ones. Hope you are doing the same.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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