We can't all be Kate Upton or Robyn Lawley.

The plight of the average sized woman has, for too long, been ignored for the sensationalist topics of fat shaming and skinny shaming. To be sure, those are both topics worthy of conversation, but in a world that seems to be so polarized on every issue, it would seem that it would only make sense that to be an average sized woman would be ideal. However, there are a myriad of reasons why that is not the case. So listed below are a few of those reasons why it can absolutely suck to be one of the many, many women between a size 10 and a size 14.

1. No one caters to your size: If I have learned anything over these past 7 years of fluctuating between three pant sizes, it’s that there is no such thing as clothing for average-sized people. There’s clothing that fits our bodies, but not clothing that is designed especially for us. In XS-XL sizes (if an XL is even made in that brand), clothes are designed with special attention to the smallest sizes. The breast to waist ratio and the waist to hip ratio are determined by the extra small, and those ratios are not changed according to increasing size. As a result, what goes on our bodies does not necessarily look good. What few brands do look good in each larger size are typically much more expensive (J. Crew, Lilly Pulitzer, et cetera) than what looks good on smaller people (everything). Essentially, there are stores made for small people and stores made for big people. We ladies in the middle just have to hope we can pull from both pools well enough to make a wardrobe. 
2. Finding cute formal clothing is nearly impossible: I realized when I came to college that formal dresses generally have minimal fabric. I have always laughed that the only thing I’m conservative about is dress, which is equal parts because I want to cover up due to self-consciousness and my lifeguard tan and because of my upbringing. When it came time for my first semi-formal, I spent hours online looking for a dress that was a perfect balance between sexy and classy and would also fit across my double D sized breasts and cover up, or at least not hug, the tops of my thighs that hadn’t been tanned in six months and vaguely resembled large curd cottage cheese. I found a black one-shouldered dress that looked fantastic on me, but I can only hope to be so lucky in the future. Like other clothes, dresses in regular sizes are designed to look good on small sizes and are just kind of scaled up for larger girls; in plus sizes, dresses are almost always too matronly for young people.
3. The cinched waist issue: Since women’s dresses are designed with thin women in mind most of the time, many dresses cinch at the natural waist. Average sized women are more likely to already have larger breasts and hips. Some, like me, have weirdly large jumps between breast, hip, and waist measurements. For us, cinching at the natural waist can lead to a look not dissimilar from that of the 1950s housewife. Sometimes the look is cute. Other times it is decidedly not. The curse of curves is very, very real. 
4. The bikini conundrum: When you have an average sized body, every time you are forced to put on a swimsuit, you are met with a choice to make. If you choose to wear a one piece, you’ll be comfortable sitting up straight, you can move without fear of falling out of your bikini top, nobody will see the stretch marks on your hips. But everyone you meet will simply assume that you are self-conscious about your body, which you might normally like a lot, and you will have terrible tan lines. If you choose to wear a bikini, you will appear more confident to those around you, and you can get a normal tan. Of course, then you’ll probably quickly wrap yourself in a towel when there are skinny people around, you’ll be afraid to sit up straight for fear of fat rolls being noticeable, and there will be absolutely zero photos taken of you that day because you will run away from anyone with a camera. 
5. The gap between regular sizes and plus sizes exists: For whatever silly reason, a lot of brands have regular sizes between a 0 and a 10, and plus sizes start at a 14 or a 16. I cannot wear those brands, and neither can many other women who fall in that range in which there is just no clothing to buy. 
6. Trendy clothing is hit or miss (but mostly miss): It makes me cringe to think about the trend of the high-waisted skater skirt and the short-sleeved crop-top that I saw at parties so much last semester. I understand the practicality; it shows just a little skin and looks really comfy for a lot of people. I can’t wear the majority of high waisted cutoff shorts because they’re just far too short, while floaty chiffon shirts with two tiers of fabric are wonderful things. Trendy clothing also often is not even made in sizes bigger than a Large, which for anyone even slightly larger than me would be terrible. Girls who aren’t skinny want to be trendy, too. 
7. Ordering online is not a viable option for anything: Recently, I ordered two dresses from a website I had never used before. I had seen one of the dresses on Pinterest and I decided that I had to have it. It was white and flowy and had flowers at the bottom. The other dress was a blue game day dress with three-quarter length sleeves. It appeared to be oversized and shift style on the computer. When I received both of them, I anxiously opened the package to reveal two dresses that immediately looked like size Smalls. While the floral dress went on my body but was way too tight across my breasts, the “oversized” blue would not so much as fit over my shoulders, which are large from competitively swimming and not from any fault of my own. That will be the last time I order something online from a store I have never bought something from before. 
8. The gym is a Catch-22: Do I go to the gym and run the risk of being the girl who everyone thinks is only there to lose weight? At my thinnest, I was a terrible runner. I am a better runner now than I was then. I am not a bad runner because I’m thick. I am a bad runner because I have chronic asthma. If I go running, I look like I am incredibly out of shape instead of only kind of out of shape like I actually am. The unfortunate part is that the only way to really become in shape is to swallow your pride and go run. 
9. The restaurant problem: Do I eat a salad to try to lose weight? I know all the skinny people around me are thinking that I didn’t get to be my size by eating spinach at every meal. Who am I fooling? Is it better just to eat what I want to eat at restaurants no matter how unhealthy it is? Continue debating that for ten minutes and eventually settle for something that isn't deep fried but also isn't entirely green. Lord knows it's what everyone else does.